We have spent the last few years waging a collective war on machine-generated text. We bemoan the robotic syntax, the predictable structural transitions, and the bloodless summaries that clutter our professional feeds.
So aggressive has the pushback been that social networks have even introduced explicit reporting mechanisms to flag automated clutter.
The underlying thesis is noble: if we could just filter out the synthetic noise, the rich, authentic hum of human wisdom would shine through.
Except that is not quite what happened.
What we get now is variations on the following;
Start with a vulnerable admission (“I cringe posting this,” “I don’t know if I should share this,” “Today I received a photo…”)
Insert a personal story that sounds profound (the desert in Qatar, having purple hair, turning 40 trauma, a corporate pivot, making a bed)
Pivot to a “lesson learned” – usually something obvious dressed up as a revelation.
Add a numbered list (because LinkedIn demands lists)
And of course add a photo that is supposed to be ‘of the moment’, but really a high-production, soft-focus portrait accompanying the deeply dramatic essay.
End with a call to action/question to drive engagement (“What’s that for you? Share it. Go on. Dare ya!”)
Optional: include a joke to seem relatable
Sure, these posts that we see ‘suggested’ every day may not be AI slop, but they are far worse – Cringe